Post by ~/Birdybot\~ on Feb 8, 2009 11:57:47 GMT -5
Vexas said he's a bit rusty at RPs, so I'll help him here! ME AND VEXAS ONLY- IF YOU WANT ME TO HELP YOU MAKE A DIFFERENT THREAD.
Right, so Vexas, please do not be offended if I say bad stuff about your posts. It's called constructive critisism- I tell you what you need to improve, you keep that in mind, and improve.
Right, so we can start off with an interesting situation. Let's see. OK, you wake up as the mythical creature/Pokemon of your choice. Standing over you is a girl no older than six or seven. All right, Vexas, I'll give you some tips!
- Describe how the character feels.
Vexas woke up there was a girl he was a Pokemon "Oh Arceus!" he said is BAD. We want more of;
Vexas woke up, feeling a little sick. It was as though his insides had been twisted up and couldn't settle back right, and his limbs felt out of proportion. This is better. You could get a nice long post out of this.
- Give the reader something to imagine. Make it easy to form a picture of the scene in their mind with plenty of discription.
- Watch grammer and spelling. From what I've seen, you need to be carefull with capital letters. Sometimes it's a good idea to read through you work, and if you click the 'spell check' button, that can be vey helpfull. It's by the 'post message' button.
Right, so Vexas, please do not be offended if I say bad stuff about your posts. It's called constructive critisism- I tell you what you need to improve, you keep that in mind, and improve.
Right, so we can start off with an interesting situation. Let's see. OK, you wake up as the mythical creature/Pokemon of your choice. Standing over you is a girl no older than six or seven. All right, Vexas, I'll give you some tips!
- Describe how the character feels.
Vexas woke up there was a girl he was a Pokemon "Oh Arceus!" he said is BAD. We want more of;
Vexas woke up, feeling a little sick. It was as though his insides had been twisted up and couldn't settle back right, and his limbs felt out of proportion. This is better. You could get a nice long post out of this.
- Give the reader something to imagine. Make it easy to form a picture of the scene in their mind with plenty of discription.
- Watch grammer and spelling. From what I've seen, you need to be carefull with capital letters. Sometimes it's a good idea to read through you work, and if you click the 'spell check' button, that can be vey helpfull. It's by the 'post message' button.